May 14, 2023

Christ and the Church:  In Marriage, In Family, In Singleness

Part 1

Pastor Jethe Custer

• Genesis 1:26-28:  Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our own image, according to Our likeness.” 27: So God created man in His own image; In the image of God He created Him.  Male and female.  He created them.  

Adam and Eve had a moral likeness to God, but it was corrupted when the sinned.

• But we now have through the redemption of our Savior Christ Jesus, the forgiveness and the washing away of our sin.  We have put off the old and put on the new.  Ephesians 4:22-24

• Ephesians 5:25:  Husbands love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for Her.

• Ephesians 5:22:  Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord.  For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the Head of the church.  

• Colossians 3:18:  Wives submit to your husbands as is fitting to the Lord.  

Children will first see the Glimpse of Christ and the Church in their parents.  If they have a Godly marriage, Children learn most from what their parents do, but also from what they hear.  

Some Words of Advice for Women

1. Single – Divorced – Widowed  

• Psalm 37:4:  Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He shall give you the desires of your heart.

• Proverbs 3:5-6:  Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your understanding.  In all your ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct your path. 

• 1 Timothy 5:14:  Therefore I desire that the younger widows marry, bear children, manage their homes and give no opportunity to the adversary to speak reproachfully.  

• 2 Corinthians 6:14:  Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers.  For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness, and what communion has light with darkness 

2. Younger Married Women

• Proverbs 31:11:  The heart of her husband safely trusts her.

• Proverbs 31:26:  She opens her mouth with wisdom and on her tongue is the law of kindness.

• Proverbs 27:15-16:  A continued dripping on a rainy day and a contentious woman are alike.  Restraining her is like restraining the wind or grasping oil in the hand.

3. Older Women

• Titus 2:3-5:  Teach the older women to be reverent, not to be slanderers, or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good.  Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, so that no one will malign the word of God.  

Part 2

Pastor John Custer

Introduction - Pastor Jethe has already given an excellent introduction to this subject, addressing the women in the church.  I will continue the subject by addressing things the men can do to build strong families, whether they are single or married.  

• 2 Timothy 2:2 The things which you have heard from me in the presence of many witnesses, entrust these to faithful men who will be able to teach others also.   NASB

Being married is not the only status a Christian can live in during his earthly life.  There are probably more single people than married ones on the earth at any given time.  Young children, single adults and single older adults account for a larger population of people than the sum total of people living as married persons. Being a single person is an important state in Christ’s Kingdom.  In this verse, all the principles the apostle Paul taught, including advice to couples, are in view.  Single men are able to teach these principles to others, even married men.  These principles include, most importantly, serving King Jesus above all else.  It will be important, therefore, to be in a small group setting in the church so that you can learn to teach.  

• 1 Corinthians 7:32-35 I want you to be free from the concerns of this life. An unmarried man can spend his time doing the Lord’s work and thinking how to please him. 33. But a married man has to think about his earthly responsibilities and how to please his wife. 34. His interests are divided. In the same way, a woman who is no longer married or has never been married can be devoted to the Lord and holy in body and in spirit. But a married woman has to think about her earthly responsibilities and how to please her husband. 35 I am saying this for your benefit, not to place restrictions on you. I want you to do whatever will help you serve the Lord best, with as few distractions as possible.

Throughout chapter 7 above, Paul gives advice which is pertinent for today.  In the church today the status of being married seems to get elevated in importance so that it seems that you can’t find real happiness until you’ve found a marriage partner.  Paul’s emphasis here is a reality check regarding this romantic fantasy which surrounds marriage.  It is not a cultic restriction which he is recommending but a sober realization that, if you marry, you will have new responsibilities in addition to the ones God already expects of you.  God’s plan is still to fill the earth with his people, so lots of birthing is scheduled.  In a marriage, it is not the romantic fantasy which carries you forward, but the ability to work as a team for the Kingdom of God.  Merely pleasing each other doesn’t have the energy, in itself, to sustain a relationship.  That is why divorce rates are so high, even among Christians.  God will supernaturally sustain your relationship and bless your way if you are pleasing your mate AND devoting yourselves as a team to do His will.  

My next point comes from Ephesians 5:25 above.  The simplest and best advice to have a healthy marriage is to DIE to your own self-interests: 

• Ephesians 5:25-27 For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her 26 to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word. 27 He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault. NLT

This results in a process of change in HER.  Just as Jesus died so that the amazing spiritual process of sanctification could start its beautiful work of changing each of us from glory to glory, the husband’s “death” starts a process of sanctification in his wife.  This is not to say that he is perfect and she is full of problems, but it is our “death,” that enhances God’s process of change in her.  We, husbands, enroll ourselves in this death process voluntarily.  Jesus’ death sets in motion our change process if we cooperate with it.  Jesus was perfect; we are not.  Because his sacrifice has made us righteous, our death is made to have some effect upon our wives.  A woman who is not married is not cheated out of this effect because Christ’s death is completely sufficient to affect change in her.  This is an amazing, miraculous phenomenon.  

Conclusion - The last point I’d like to make is to recognize the cheap assault the devil has made upon the family from the time of Adam and Eve.  He really can do very little to the Christian except to lie.  His main assault, since he can’t destroy planets or stop the biological forces which create life on earth is to lie to humans, telling them that they don’t need God, and that they can be any gender that they want.  It is a cheap, impotent assault, doomed to failure, designed to disrupt God’s plan for mankind to multiply and fill the earth.  As Christians learn to fearlessly obey God, their marriages get stronger, their families get stronger and they reproduce more and more.  There simply aren’t enough demons to keep up with the Christian reproduction, both spiritually (making disciples) and physically (giving birth).  We’ve probably already outnumbered demons many times over!  Our testimony is that: 

• Psalm 127:3 Children are a gift from the LORD; they are a reward from him. 4 Children born to a young man are like arrows in a warrior’s hands. 5 How joyful is the man whose quiver is full of them! He will not be put to shame when he confronts his accusers at the city gates.

This is probably what John meant when He wrote (Revelation 12:11) “they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and the word of their testimony.”